Friday, February 15, 2008

Tis the day after Valentine's day...

...and imagine my feelings of excitement when the postman arrives with a long awaited beautiful parcel from India, covered in a mini pillow slip of fine cotton, sewn together to keep the contents in perfect condition.

Could this contain the jewelled tiara, to make up for a solo St Valentine? Perhaps a little cashmere scarf in heart stopping colours, or some silks for darling D to sew into a glamorous outfit? A new percussion instrument for Drummer boy?

Mmmm no!


A torch, an old belt, a necklacy thing with a hook on it...AND AN OLD PAIR OF WORK GLOVES FOR SHIFTING WOOD.

I already have a pair of work gloves. It is true that they are getting a lot of use, but I don't need another pair...just yet.

But there is more:

A bag of spices that has exploded. What are these tiny brown pellets like bits of cork that are everywhere?

There is no covering letter to tell me what these specks of brown and black are in and out of their little bags. I expect the green balls with brown patches on are amla going off.


There are some dark and dangerous looking dried chilis, and this:


Now, if you look closely you will see that there is a button at the bottom of the plunging neckline of this glorious object which I presumed to be some kind of waistcoat. I spent half an hour with it hanging around my neck, forcing the button to sit uncomfortably under my breasts until I realised that it must be a handbag. This is what happens when there are no instructions...

My vague tetchy bad temper of yesterday has developed into something a lot more grumpy and shouty.

I don't envy the children when they get home from school...

6 comments:

kool drum said...

with an attitude like that you may well lose the 3 regular readers you`ve got, including me (not to mention the drummer boy and darling D). what happened to the zen, confident person I talked to a few days ago. do I have to send tiaras to keep you happy, if so it is hardly compatible with the "don`t spend any money" that echos around my head when faced with multifarious shopping possibilities. there are 2 more packages on the way, I can hardly contain my anticipation of the joy on your blog when they arrive.
ps the black stuff is very fine quality Organic Assam tea for making tchai, do not throw it away!!!

Rosie said...

Does this mean that there is another pair of work gloves on its way? Can you please include some clues as to what these things are in future (for the things that arent work gloves) ?
By the way, I am still confident, but bad tempered..It will probably pass...the bad temper, I mean, not the confidence...
if you find just a small tiara...

amy said...

Come on now, a bad attitude is a must for readability! Though I thought those work gloves were a nice touch...But don't want to get in the middle of anything here.

Lucy said...

Two new concepts: the anti-Valentine's present and the virtual getting-stuck-in-the-middle-of-someone-else's-domestic... what a rich experience blogging is!
Could you not have got someone to take a pic of you with that thing buttoned under your breasts? After the shot of your bottom bathing Porridge, it's the logical next step...
I'll have the work gloves if you don't want them.

Rosie said...

amy-since he is 6 thousand miles away, everyone is in the middle of us. Anyway I started my blog post in good faith as witnessed by the photo of the unopened parcel full of promise. All I did was describe what was in it!
Lucy- I promise that any more work gloves which arrive will have your name on them. I will try to persuade darling D to take a photo tomorrow.But what I really want to know is why Tom wont eat pasta...

meggie said...

I laughed! I loved!
I do NOT like Tea, in any guise.
Throw it away! haha.