I spent the best part of yesterday filling in forms, photocopying my press book, and struggling to write a motivational letter in French.
Why? Yes I asked myself that question quite a few times.
I want to study. I want to get a formal qualification as a music teacher.
In France the system is competitive. There is not an absolute standard.
There are only a small number of places and you have to fight for them.
So what chance do I have? At my age and in a language not my own. How will I pay for it?
With a musical background which is unorthodox and very patchy- I know a great deal about some things and nothing about others. And I dont know what it is that I dont know. This could be embarassing...
Then I came by accident upon the last lecture, called "achieving your childhood dreams", of a computer scientist who died a few days ago aged 48, and he gave me some advice.
"The brick walls are there for a reason...they allow us to prove how badly we want something."
He is my secret boyfriend.
4 days ago